What events is Weird Al referring to in his song, "Headline News?"?

Once, there was this kid who

Took a trip to Singapore and brought along his spray paint

And when he finally came back

He had cane marks all over his bottom

He said that it was from when

The warden whacked it so hard

This refers to Michael Kane, and American in SIngapore who was jailed and sentenced to caning for graffitti

Mmm mmm mmm mmm, mmm mmm mmm mmm

(*whip* sound) Ahh

Once there was this girl who

Swore that one day she would be a figure skating champion

And when she finally made it

She saw some other girl who was better (*ding* sound)

And so she hired some guy to

Club her in the kneecap

This refers to fingure skater Tonya Harding who had her ex-husband and friend whack Nancy Kerrigan in the kneecap to get her spot on the Olympic Ice Skating Team

Mmm mmm mmm mmm, mmm mmm mmm mmm

(*thwack* sound) Ahh

Mmm mmm mmm mmm, mmm mmm mmm mmm

They got paid for their sound bites

And sold their TV movie rights

And then, there was this guy who

Made his wife so mad one night that she cut off his weiner

And when he finally came to

He found that Mr. Happy was missing

He couldn't quite explain it

It'd always just been there

This refers to John Bobbit, who's wife Lorena cut off his penis while he wqas sleeping and flung it from her car as she drove away.

Mmm mmm mmm mmm, mmm mmm mmm mmm

Mmm mmm mmm mmm, mmm mmm mmm mmm

Ahh ahh (There) ahh ahh (Were), ahh ahh (There) ahh ahh (Is)

Ahh ahh (There) ahh ahh (Were), ahh ahh (There) ahh ahh (Is)

Ahh ahh (There) ahh ahh (Were), ahh ahh (There) ahh ahh (Is)

Ahh ahh (There) ahh ahh (Were), ahh ahh (There) ahh ahh (Is)

(There were, there is)

(There were, there is)

What events is Weird Al referring to in his song, "Headline News?"?events

No problem. It was fun to scratch my brain for the names and then find the links! Report It